Tonight I met with my new personal trainer. Yes, I have gone and done the unthinkable for us non-Hollywood types. Even as I start a new job, I have made my trainer a mandatory part of my budget. I have accepted that only supervised weight loss will work for me since I’m such a stubborn hard head. My first assignment is to track my diet and do an hour of cardio five days a week on my own until my doctor clears me to work out strenuously. And why am I doing this? Glad you asked. So now I have to tell you.
I’m 31. I want to have children one day. I know that doesn’t require weight loss, but my overall physical condition is important to me. Children need healthy parents. Understand that my version of having children clearly incorporates adoption and a possible only because God made it happen pregnancy or two. Miraculous pregnancy aside, I need to be able to keep up with the children. I want to play in the park, go hiking, do outdoor sports and carry those heavy behind carriages with ease. I don’t want strenuous activity to be a problem, and I want to be flexible enough for other things I enjoy. Parenting will be a new part of my life’s journey, and I know that I’ll need strength for the journey.
But you know what I realize, the journey isn’t all physical. I was over at the After Party and whispered to God to give Hostess strength for the journey. Your mind, your emotions, your spirit–they all need nurturing. And even though I’ve been a bit lethargic and pensive lately (as opposed to anxiety ridden last week), I can’t get stuck there. I mean, I’ve been thinking about everything lately. Since my teens and early twenties, I haven’t given a lot of thought to what type of life I wanted to have besides one that included employment and regular shopping. But things change. And now I want more. I’ve done much of what I put on my personal short list, and I want to give more. I look at the people around me, some happy and some not, and envy them not. All of them. But yet I want more—more time, more love, more money, more health, more wealth (which is far more than money). And I want it all in the fulness of time. But getting to each one of those things is a separate twist or turn in my journey, and God knows that I’m not even close to finished yet.
Just like I’m taking the time to prepare my body, the rest of me has to be fit for the journey too and that all comes in time. Really, time seems like it’s in short supply compared to all my goals and desires, but how much time does it take for one life to change a whole world? Only one moment. Jesus split time. While I’m no Jesus, even the worst of us can accomplish more with the best in us in one moment than we can sometimes in a whole life time. And sometimes the bulk of a life’s journey is just preparation for that moment. And for that moment, you need God’s strength. And that’s what I ask for today for you and me, strength for the journey.
“And sometimes the bulk of a life’s journey is just preparation for that moment.”
SO SO SO true!! and when you start to see how “little” things from the past are now playing a role in shaping your present and future, it’s amazing. GOD is amazing.
i feel like time is way short in supply also. i’m pushing up on 27 and with each year that passes, i discover more things i’d like to accomplish yet seem so far from achieving. i keep telling God that i don’t wanna be 40 years old when i just really start getting into the “meat” of my life, LOL. but He tells me right on back that it’s not “my will but Thy (His) will.”
you’re so much like me in that i think about my body with respect to having kids one day too. for me, it’s about being healthy and able to keep up and have energy for them. but also, thinking about labor and delivery! the better condition you’re in, the easier the labor and delivery are supposed to be. let’s hope!
I’m actually excited that I’m going to have to deliver by c-section, but I still want to be in the best shape possible. My only reservation about child birth has always been labor. I’ve never found anything romantic or idealistic about pain.
Comment by dragonflysoul — February 20, 2008 @ 1:31 p
p.s. and i hope things have gone well with your personal training! i’m all late, i know, but still…
congratulations on taking the initiative to get out there and push your body to the limits! and i admire your getting a personal trainer - i’m scared of them! :-S
Girl, I had to let the trainer go. My doctor made me stop with the working out, but I’m trying to maintain with my diet with varying degrees of success depending on the day. I’m certainly not gaining though. I may just do a detox soon and start from there until I work out some health issues that came up.
Comment by dragonflysoul — February 20, 2008 @ 1:31 p